November 16, 2020
*Good or bad, this is honest*
I’m laying down for my sleep time. I just finished my day shift 3pm to 7pm. And we swapped to sailing from motoring about 5:30 or so, maybe. And the wind has been shifting around and autopilot starting turning 30degrees into the wind and acting up and all sorts and my anxiety is flaring. I’m feeling tense, anxious, on edge. All that. I’m not comfortable with a night shift where I have to do something. I am fine sitting there and keeping an eye but I don’t want to have to do anything. Not there yet. I’m no where near that confident yet. I need to get comfortable sailing. Period. During the day. Anchoring before dark. Sailing during the day. So evening two I’m feeling completely different than I did yesterday. Hopefully I’m rested and relaxed come my night shift…right now I’m incredibly nervous and on edge. And the auto pilot sounds funny…I’m not good at steering a straight course of it craps out and we have to steer the rest of the time. I’m learning a lot about my fear and comfort levels, with sailing, right now.
*Long time later, only happy comment about my night shift*
I was greeted by bioluminescents! It was beautiful. If the motor hadn’t been so loud I would have talked to them.
November 17, 2020
I should have kept better track but I know we put a reef in the main and the Genoa during my evening shift. Brady traded me shifts this day so I did the two 7-11 shifts and he did my typical 3-7 shifts. But he ended up being up for probably two hours of my evening shift because the weather was starting to get crazy and the sea was being more rough. And I was not enjoying it. I was having a difficult time. I think by morning we had at least two reefs in both.
